16 August 2008
Yeah... I am so happy man today.. My sis gave birth to little angel today... I am still thinking how she looks... eagerly waiting to see her picture.. Cant sleep..Cant eat... excited... Happy.. No more words...
Help me with cute names :)
24 March 2008
As the months turn into weeks and weeks turn into days,
there is some kind of thinking that has started to take its rounds in my mind.
Few more months and I am yet another year older.
And this time, into my mid twenties.
I am not sure if everyone undergoing this phase of their life experience the same, but this time,
for me it is getting a bit tough to think that I am indeed getting old.
I have already started thinking "Hari is getting old"! I now realise that there are younger people than me walking around on Mother earth. A younger generation and already, there seems to be a generation gap between me and the young folks. Now, edging towards the later part of the glorious period of any individual, as I look back into my past and try to analyse all that has happened in this short span, I realise that there were times when I had been free of any worries or hassles. My only ones used to be to win a fight over my elder sister, getting an pair of basketball shoes from my mom, trying to acheive more in Basketball, become the super duper basketball hero of India. Small things that used to mean a lot to me.
As I look at my long list of friends (Orkut say I have 385 friends), I stop to wonder if I am really doing the right thing in having so many contacts or acquaintances. It seems as if there is some strange pair of eyes always following you. Now with social networking sites and the urge to notify your list of anything and everything that you do, I dont think there is any privacy at all in one's life.
As I think about the role of friendships that have been a part of me and my life, I start to realise so many things. There have been people who have been selfish, who have not understood me. Those whom I had considered very close have betrayed me and gotten the better of me, just for the fact that I let them to, in the name of 'friendship'.
Some of them whom I have considered close to me haven't been the best as I believed them to be. And also, now I realise that those whom I have lost contacts with, are the ones whom I miss and will miss throughout the rest of my life. Those whom I dint have the slightest idea of getting to know have been the ones who have made me smile when I cried, who always stand behind me in my happiness and tough time.
At times, or rather, always, I wonder why I am into this career. Is this what I always wanted to be? What happened to all my childhood dreams? Those early morning basketball, those big tournament, those dream National games, those beautiful state team , those beautiful All India University team, those million memories that were washed ashore in this ocean of life. The dreams that meant so much to me had been brutally murdered and laid to wither. Not that I am not doing good in what I am doing now. But the sense of satisfaction is one that this life lacks in terms of career ( still i love my job ). Something which I always yearned to do has been a dream and is going to stay a dream. To pursue the dream at this point of my life is gonna be tough and sometimes even scary and that's the reason why somethings are better left unaccomplished.
There are so many things now that I have started to ponder upon. Things that have become opinionated. Starting to analyse each and everything that I have done and will be doing. I realise there are so many limitations to my life and the way I want to live. I cant take my own decisions and I cant lead my own life. But I still have to live it.
I sometimes feel lonely and insecure. Even with the hundreds of loved voices that would always be more than willing to lend a ear to my woes. But the thought of talking to friends over the same things, moaning the same laments is something that I have started hating. As I think of all this and more, I badly want to relive my past, the past that is slowly and steadily drifting away from me.
I know I have got the best of life and also the worst of life, as I try hard to figure the hidden meaning of this precious thing called LIFE. All I can tell myself is 'Everything happens for a reason' as I start gathering those lost little pieces of ME.
'I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I -
I took the one less traveled by
And that has made all the difference. '
From "You Come Too", 1916
The Road Not Taken
by: Robert Frost
5 March 2008
Yeah.. At last another milestone in Career... Officially Promoted..
What I have gained:
More work,
More problems,
More responsibility,
and more.....
What I have lost:
Sleep,
Peace,
Happiness,
and more..
Still loving it.. yahooooooooooooooo... :)
27 February 2008
Period - Sometimes makes history , sometimes makes Future.. But what is real meaning in dictionary...
Period -Life, and Death.
How I wish Death came before Life just as in a dictionary. Period.
Life will be really good if that happens.. God please rewrite your thoughts ... I wish that will happen in our next birth....
Who am I living for? Who am I trying to please?
Who is the one who controls my life?
Is there anything that I can do for myself?
Why am I trying to fool the world?
Am I the one whom I am trying to portray?
Is the life that I am living exactly what I would like to be?
Why does life have to be so confusing?
Why do these desires exist, why does this search live on?
Why is the heart so impatient, why is it so impulsive?
Should I live for my mind or my soul?
And finally, Is all this really worth it?
As always, disconnected thoughts...
28 January 2008
This is something that may be considered very lazy but I have to admit that some times the sense of being totally free and nothing to do can be very relaxing and refreshing in it self. In the hustle and bustle of our jet age which is so much dictated by schedule’s ,deadline’s , to do list and all sort of time table , u tend to miss the small details of life , things which may be very small and futile if u look at it in a logical way , but things that may give u a special kind of satisfaction , last night I did just that. Standing near beach and watching fireworks with mum and dad, now that may sound real boring or lazy stuff for some of you , but this is something I use to enjoy doing as a kid but as you grow up u tend to lose touch with that childish dreamy world and become more realistic goal oriented achievers or losers. but last night I again found the joy of being a kid when watching those wonderful fireworks up in the sky ,and day dreamed of being a astronaut flying on a mission to mars…. Sounds silly , but strangely I felt free from all the work , emotional stress I was in . Encouraged by this experiences today we ( mum, dad and Ram ) went to blue mountain, after a long time i got to hear a very sweet but now unfamiliar sound … a sound of a bird sing and the sound of a fluttering leaves , I had almost forgot that there are exist such sweets sounds too. In the hectic week ahead which will be full of sounds of vehicle’s honking in a traffic jam, people shouting at each other , managers giving more dead line and mobiles ringing . I will miss that sweet bird’s song and will long to count my stars .
5 January 2008
A year that has gone by in high-speed...
one that has been different of a kind...New things learnt from everyone...
New experiences and totally new feelings...
New friends who is deep in my heart...
Few lost souls....
Few gained weight....
40 + 325 days...two different countries on the two different continents...
But one day of the year that was expected and awaited for long...31st Dec...
A long journey that just came to an end...A huge sigh of relief...
whatever, expecting the new 2008 to be better and fun filled...
Expecting newer experiences and new moments.
Wishing everyone a very happy new year filled with surprises, surprises and more surprises...
Thats another year again, a year of hopes, a year of dreams, a year of plans... and a leap year too!!! So we have another extra 24 hours in 2008.
This new was little New year is bit different from last 3 years..., I was with my mum and dad, for the first time in almost 5 years. New year at Sydney or Adelaide has always been fun, staying awake at the crack of the new year and calling all friends and family to wish them.
This year has been different from the start. Mum and Dad wished me first... Then i didn't go anywhere out...
A travel back to Sydney from Melbourne on the 31st,
But otherwise, there hasn't been anything at all.
After mum and dad slept, house has been all mine for a while and the feeling is actually eerie, going back bed with lot of things in mind, though I love the personal space that I have gained for last 3 years still felt weird.
2007 was filled with Long days at work, going back late and just waiting to hit the bed very early are few symptoms which i really don't want to see this year. Maybe, I am growing old every day!!! Sigh!!!
Hoping with all my heart that 2008 is a great year for all people, good and bad, which includes me too!!!
