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Yeah... I am so happy man today.. My sis gave birth to little angel today... I am still thinking how she looks... eagerly waiting to see her picture.. Cant sleep..Cant eat... excited... Happy.. No more words...

Help me with cute names :)

As the months turn into weeks and weeks turn into days,
there is some kind of thinking that has started to take its rounds in my mind.
Few more months and I am yet another year older.
And this time, into my mid twenties.
I am not sure if everyone undergoing this phase of their life experience the same, but this time,
for me it is getting a bit tough to think that I am indeed getting old.
I have already started thinking "Hari is getting old"! I now realise that there are younger people than me walking around on Mother earth. A younger generation and already, there seems to be a generation gap between me and the young folks. Now, edging towards the later part of the glorious period of any individual, as I look back into my past and try to analyse all that has happened in this short span, I realise that there were times when I had been free of any worries or hassles. My only ones used to be to win a fight over my elder sister, getting an pair of basketball shoes from my mom, trying to acheive more in Basketball, become the super duper basketball hero of India. Small things that used to mean a lot to me.

As I look at my long list of friends (Orkut say I have 385 friends), I stop to wonder if I am really doing the right thing in having so many contacts or acquaintances. It seems as if there is some strange pair of eyes always following you. Now with social networking sites and the urge to notify your list of anything and everything that you do, I dont think there is any privacy at all in one's life.

As I think about the role of friendships that have been a part of me and my life, I start to realise so many things. There have been people who have been selfish, who have not understood me. Those whom I had considered very close have betrayed me and gotten the better of me, just for the fact that I let them to, in the name of 'friendship'.

Some of them whom I have considered close to me haven't been the best as I believed them to be. And also, now I realise that those whom I have lost contacts with, are the ones whom I miss and will miss throughout the rest of my life. Those whom I dint have the slightest idea of getting to know have been the ones who have made me smile when I cried, who always stand behind me in my happiness and tough time.

At times, or rather, always, I wonder why I am into this career. Is this what I always wanted to be? What happened to all my childhood dreams? Those early morning basketball, those big tournament, those dream National games, those beautiful state team , those beautiful All India University team, those million memories that were washed ashore in this ocean of life. The dreams that meant so much to me had been brutally murdered and laid to wither. Not that I am not doing good in what I am doing now. But the sense of satisfaction is one that this life lacks in terms of career ( still i love my job ). Something which I always yearned to do has been a dream and is going to stay a dream. To pursue the dream at this point of my life is gonna be tough and sometimes even scary and that's the reason why somethings are better left unaccomplished.

There are so many things now that I have started to ponder upon. Things that have become opinionated. Starting to analyse each and everything that I have done and will be doing. I realise there are so many limitations to my life and the way I want to live. I cant take my own decisions and I cant lead my own life. But I still have to live it.

I sometimes feel lonely and insecure. Even with the hundreds of loved voices that would always be more than willing to lend a ear to my woes. But the thought of talking to friends over the same things, moaning the same laments is something that I have started hating. As I think of all this and more, I badly want to relive my past, the past that is slowly and steadily drifting away from me.

I know I have got the best of life and also the worst of life, as I try hard to figure the hidden meaning of this precious thing called LIFE. All I can tell myself is 'Everything happens for a reason' as I start gathering those lost little pieces of ME.

'I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I -
I took the one less traveled by
And that has made all the difference. '

From "You Come Too", 1916

The Road Not Taken
by: Robert Frost

Yeah.. At last another milestone in Career... Officially Promoted..

What I have gained:
More work,
More problems,
More responsibility,
and more.....

What I have lost:
Sleep,
Peace,
Happiness,
and more..

Still loving it.. yahooooooooooooooo... :)

Period - Sometimes makes history , sometimes makes Future.. But what is real meaning in dictionary...

Period -Life, and Death.

How I wish Death came before Life just as in a dictionary. Period.


Life will be really good if that happens.. God please rewrite your thoughts ... I wish that will happen in our next birth....

Who am I living for? Who am I trying to please?
Who is the one who controls my life?
Is there anything that I can do for myself?
Why am I trying to fool the world?
Am I the one whom I am trying to portray?
Is the life that I am living exactly what I would like to be?
Why does life have to be so confusing?
Why do these desires exist, why does this search live on?
Why is the heart so impatient, why is it so impulsive?
Should I live for my mind or my soul?

And finally, Is all this really worth it?

As always, disconnected thoughts...

This is something that may be considered very lazy but I have to admit that some times the sense of being totally free and nothing to do can be very relaxing and refreshing in it self. In the hustle and bustle of our jet age which is so much dictated by schedule’s ,deadline’s , to do list and all sort of time table , u tend to miss the small details of life , things which may be very small and futile if u look at it in a logical way , but things that may give u a special kind of satisfaction , last night I did just that. Standing near beach and watching fireworks with mum and dad, now that may sound real boring or lazy stuff for some of you , but this is something I use to enjoy doing as a kid but as you grow up u tend to lose touch with that childish dreamy world and become more realistic goal oriented achievers or losers. but last night I again found the joy of being a kid when watching those wonderful fireworks up in the sky ,and day dreamed of being a astronaut flying on a mission to mars…. Sounds silly , but strangely I felt free from all the work , emotional stress I was in . Encouraged by this experiences today we ( mum, dad and Ram ) went to blue mountain, after a long time i got to hear a very sweet but now unfamiliar sound … a sound of a bird sing and the sound of a fluttering leaves , I had almost forgot that there are exist such sweets sounds too. In the hectic week ahead which will be full of sounds of vehicle’s honking in a traffic jam, people shouting at each other , managers giving more dead line and mobiles ringing . I will miss that sweet bird’s song and will long to count my stars .

A year that has gone by in high-speed...
one that has been different of a kind...New things learnt from everyone...
New experiences and totally new feelings...
New friends who is deep in my heart...
Few lost souls....
Few gained weight....
40 + 325 days...two different countries on the two different continents...
But one day of the year that was expected and awaited for long...31st Dec...
A long journey that just came to an end...A huge sigh of relief...

whatever, expecting the new 2008 to be better and fun filled...
Expecting newer experiences and new moments.

Wishing everyone a very happy new year filled with surprises, surprises and more surprises...

Thats another year again, a year of hopes, a year of dreams, a year of plans... and a leap year too!!! So we have another extra 24 hours in 2008.

This new was little New year is bit different from last 3 years..., I was with my mum and dad, for the first time in almost 5 years. New year at Sydney or Adelaide has always been fun, staying awake at the crack of the new year and calling all friends and family to wish them.

This year has been different from the start. Mum and Dad wished me first... Then i didn't go anywhere out...

A travel back to Sydney from Melbourne on the 31st,

But otherwise, there hasn't been anything at all.

After mum and dad slept, house has been all mine for a while and the feeling is actually eerie, going back bed with lot of things in mind, though I love the personal space that I have gained for last 3 years still felt weird.

2007 was filled with Long days at work, going back late and just waiting to hit the bed very early are few symptoms which i really don't want to see this year. Maybe, I am growing old every day!!! Sigh!!!

Hoping with all my heart that 2008 is a great year for all people, good and bad, which includes me too!!!

Few things I came to know in last couple of days

What do you do when you are down?

I usually fix the problem. But sometimes there are many external factors involved - mostly intangible. It is when things are not in your control that you have a tough time.

Distractions are one way to go. Play, watch a good movie, read a comics, spend time with friends etc. But once the distraction stops, it seems like the earlier thoughts come back with vengeance.

Talking yourself into a frame of mind is another. You know, things like: "It will be alright", "It is for the better", "This too shall pass", "Tomorrow, something will happen and it will be like this problem never even existed" etc.

Acceptance, may be? But that needs the maturity of a saint. If you had that attitude, the problem would have never seemed like a problem in the first place, right?

Counting your blessings. This seems pretty lame-ass to me right now.

What do YOU do anyway?

Best moments in life:
Talking about person you love.
A sweet conversation.
Get a hug from someone you love.
Eyes filled with tears after a laugh.
Holding hands with your love on a long walk.
Sudden raindrops on the tip of the nose.
Kicking a little pebble lazily
As you stroll with your loved one.
Life looks different when cupid strikes.
And no one can escape it.
For some cupid strikes before marriage
And for some its after marriage.
That's the only difference.

3rd Diwali thousands of miles away from home, away from all loved ones.
But it is gonna be something different.

No sound of crackers.
No illuminated lights on the streets.
No special sweets.
No waking up early.
No holiday.
No TV programs.
No signs of Diwali.

But still it is Diwali...

Wishing you all a happy and safe Diwali

Picture Courtesy: Kaivalya Prasad

As I crossed the bridge at Great Ocean Drive listening to the sweet mesmerizing voice of AR, it was then that it struck to me that this was the last time that I would be passing this way in this trip. Yeah!! My Holidays was over and I would be going back to Sydney in 2days..after my wonderful break. The heavily lashing rains woke me up from the lovely memories of Melbourne that I was to take home back with me and all the lovely friends that I had made here in Melbourne in just few days. I managed to complete my last minute packing with lot of confusion and pain..... At last I was seated in the Qantas ( wish i missed the fight ) which would accompany me on my way back to Sydney. Below few lines was my experiences in few days

"Life is just about new experiences. It is truly not a bed of roses.
We pass through all these hurdles and shortcomings to emerge as a new personality.
That is what my short stay in Melbourne has taught me..
New Friends which i never thought of!!
New Experiences which i never had before!!
New Approach to life which i never thought about!!
Varied Learning to smile 3 days Continuously!!
and many more....
At last, the time to bid goodbye to my dear!! Happening City (Melbourne ) has come...
I left Melbourne Carrying all the
wonderful memories of this 3 days stay here in this Happening City!!
Indeed Missing the traffic Fines!!
Missing the little jokes of Vatsa, Preethi, Raj and Many more!!
Missing the city as such and all those lovely people there!!
Mebbe that is the reason for the Cold in Melbourne..
The city is just not ready to part with me and of course even me either!!
Psst...Dont ask me why Sydney is also Cold!!"

But now I was astonished at the change of emotions that I was experiencing. My thoughts transported me to the past. The lovely places that I had visited. Right from the Ocean drive and lots of beautiful places. The lovely friend with whom I had grown close to for ages. And the most memorable part...My most cherished part..It was in this short stay that I was able to visualize "How can we feel Different" . I had enjoyed each and every minute there. The time spent in Preethi's House.. Cracking Jokes from Vatsa and Raj.. Awesome Dinner with new special persons in my life..all the wonderful new friends that I had got to know.
Truly I would be missing all this fun and frolic. With all these thoughts, I landed in Sydney Airport and I noticed that the rains had not stopped yet. With a heavy heart, I realised that the nature also was shedding tears for me sharing my inconsolable pain. My eyes slowly contributing to the heavy drops of rain here in Sydney.

Miss you All.. Hope You all Enjoyed a lot.. :)

Ya hooooooo its my 50th Post with some useful information :)

• Getup 15 minutes earlier
• Prepare for the morning the night before
• Avoid tight-fitting clothes.
• Don't rely on your memory
• Practice preventative maintenance
• Make duplicate keys and store them where you can get to them
• Say 'no' more often
• Set priorities in your life
• Avoid negative people
• Use your time wisely
• Simplify everything you can
• Make copies of important papers and store them where you'll be able to find them
• repair anything that doesn't work properly
• Ask for help
• Chunk down big jobs into little ones
• View problems as challenges
• Look at challenges as opportunities
• Unclutter your life.
• Smile
• Be prepared for rain
• Laugh at something
• Pet a dog or cat
• Don't try to know all the answers
• Look for the silver lining
• Say something nice to someone
• Teach a kid to fly a kite
• Walk in the rain
• Schedule some time each day to play.
• Take a long shower or a bubble bath
• Be Conscious of the decisions you make
• Believe in yourself
• Stop beating yourself up
• Stop saying negative things to yourself.
• Visualize yourself winning
• Develop your sense of humor
• Stop thinking that tomorrow will be a better day
• Set goals for yourself.
• Say hello to a stranger
• Ask a friend for a hug
• Give a friend a hug.
• Look at the stars
• Breathe slowly
• Learn to whistle
• Read a poem
• Listen to some music you've never heard before
• Watch a ballet
• Read something
• Do something new.
• Stop a bad habit.
• Buy yourself a flower
• Smell the flower
• Find support from others
• Give support to others
• Do it today.
• Work at being cheerful and optimistic
• Put safety first.
• Do everything you do in moderation.
• Pay attention to your appearance
• Strive for excellence, not perfection
• Stretch your limits a little each day
• Look at a painting or a sculpture
• Hum a song.
• Eat nutritiously
• Plant a tree
• Feed a bird
• Practice grace under pressure
• Stand up and stretch
• Have a "plan B"
• Draw a picture
• Buy some crayons and color
• Learn a joke.
• Be responsible for your feelings
• Meet your own needs.
• Know you limitations and let others know them, too.
• Throw a paper airplane
• Exercise
• Learn the words to a song
• Get to work early
• clean out one closet or one drawer
• Go on a picnic
• Take a different route to work
• Put an air freshener in your car
• Watch a movie
• Eat some popcorn while you watch a movie.
• Write a note to someone you haven't heard from in a while
• Take a walk.
• Go to a ball game and scream
• Eat a meal by candle light.
• Recognize the importance of unconditional love.
• Remember that stress is an attitude.
• Keep a journal
• Practice a smile
• Remember that there are always options
• Develop a support system
• Quit trying to "fix" people.
• Get enough sleep
• Talk less
• Listen more
• Praise others
• Stop counting things.

and that happens only in India...

-When I bought those palm seeds from a cart vendor
-When I had that biiig bite of those juicy delicious mangoes of India…
-when someone knocked my door to collect and deliver those ironed clothes
-when I asked my mum to cook those fabulous ‘South Indian Pongal’
-when I gave that small amount of money to all waiters served us...
-When I hand picked my shirts from Peter England for 600 Bucks…
-When I saw my mum's smile when i bought her saree..

Oh! Well well…it was awersome 23 days with lot of happiness, advise and ofcourse problem.. its was a journey of traveling from a place with sub-zero temperature to a place with never-zero temperature is an adventure :)

A journey of a kind
One only of its kind
A long way, all through the way
Comforting and soothening...
Fun-filled 23 days,
Your own unique ways
Times for laughter
Times for tears
A friendly soul, always close
Precious moments
Those of joy and happiness
As you depart,
With you, you carry,
Those little pieces of Me!!!

Sometimes we believe in certain people.. have expectations from them...
Some one said we should not expect.. but we are human.. and expectations and human go together..

There are so many complications in life.. and most of it is because of these expectations..
Be it professional .. be it personal.. these always have some value.. Its a different topic if we are able to meet other's expectation or not..

We might not be raising upto that level.. and when we dont and see the pain in our loved ones... we feel guilty.. and not go and advise.. don't have any expectations from me.. or nobody has ever had any expectation from me.. These are words of escapism...

When in a relationship.. be it parent child, brother sister, husband wife.. even in friendship.. we need to know that a little bit of affection is always expected... You need to be confident that when the whole world leaves me alone... my friend is always there for me...That is what is friendship after all... The confidence in the other person, the trust which you have on that person irrespective of whether the person will really do it for you.

What if there comes a situation you are no longer going to trust your friend... the friendship is off on a vacation.. probably that is the day, you realize, you did a mistake...

They say.. parents are by chance
friends are by choice

Times have changed...no matter what....
Sleep is but a luxury..
No need to get back home...becoz there is no one there waiting for you....not mom,dad gal friend or sis
Food....yikees..keep missing on that one...there used to be days i kept eating on and on...
Friends don't mean all that much as they did previously.....or just that Im loosing it..
Fun has lost its meaning ....
Work has taken top priority...
24x7 a day is not enough...
Get tired....and sleep...

Gone are those days i used to have lunch with frenz...
hang around with them every where in cbe....jobless.....
Speak with someone special and tell what i feel....what do i do when i have no one to speak to??
...nope...all i do is speak official talk.....is there something called a personal talk??(hmmm ..)
No social life...

My life is taking a turn....
I hate to depend on ppl...no matter what....even when it comes to some sacrifices..I will give up becoz i am use to it now a days....

The whole point of being here is finish my masters ( which i did ) and to work ( which i am doing now, am i justifying it??)

This is Different life...:D


Things you will learn when you get here...
It aint worth breaking down...becoz no one is there to hear to what you say...
Never take anyones shoulder when u need help...u are old enough to be on your own...
You are never given any priority.....in anyones life...
You dont mean anything to anyone here...

to talk,
to share my thoughts,
to fight,
to match my wavelength,
to console, to be consoled,
to cry,
to compete,
to feel jealous,
to create furore,
to blame,
to pacify,
to patch up,
to be a bridge of feelings,
to understand,
to be a part of me!!

I wish some one is not busy and some one didn't forgot me..